New Web Sites

Thailand Love Doctor - advice for relationships with Thai people, free forum
Thai2News - Thailand portal
Education Advice - free education advice Sphere: Related Content

Suvarnabhumi Warning in Wikipedia

Airport Mafia Documented

I was amazed to discover that Wikipedia has documented the corruption at the new airport and named the AOT managment as being part of the problem.

Irregularities

Several thugs and cheats, the majority of them illegal taxi drivers and tour guides, are to be found preying upon tourists within the arrival hall. These scammers belong to major, politically-well connected criminal groups: Kamnan Samruay, Boonruang Srisang, Sak Pakphanang, the Pattaya Mafia and Phuyai Daeng. Measures to evict them have proven ineffectual due to their being well connected with top AoT executives (it is alleged that the head of the Pirap gang is personally related to an AoT executive, while the Phuyai Daeng enjoys good connections with influential civil servants in Samut Prakan).

See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suvarnabhumi_Airport

There's also a warning about the shoplifting scam, and mentions three embassies that have advised tourists to be aware of the invisible shop boundaries to avoid being scammed of thousands in euros/pounds/baht. Sphere: Related Content

New Version of Speak Easy Thai

I finally finished testing the new version of the Multi-Language Dictionary (MLD) Web Update and the new version of Speak Easy Thai. You can download them here:

http://www.thai-software.com/MultiLangDict/Pages/Download.htm

I have changed the name of MLD Web Update to MLD Download Manager, which more closely indicates its purpose in life. It has new, robust Internet access routines and tries to recover gracefully from timeouts and stalled downloads, a necessity here in Thailand.

Speak Easy Thai gains a self-test in the Alphabet section, and an "All Tests" button on the main menu, so you can bypass the vocabulary reviews and just jump directly to the self-tests. Sphere: Related Content

Multi-Language Dictionary Forum Has Moved

The Multi-Language Dictionary Forum has moved from Toronto, Ontario, to Houston, Texas; this is the first stage in getting my Thai software site off of the expensive Canadian server and onto the cheap US one, which is where all my other sites are hosted. The new address of the forum is:

http://www.thai-culture-publishing.com/Forum/

I have been working on Speak Easy Thai and MLD Web Update, and will be uploading new versions of these shortly. The new MLD Web Update supports the Texas server, and does so without using Microsoft's crappy Internet subroutines which were introduced in IE4. This version of Web Update replaces those subroutines with lower-level, and IE-independent, Windows Sockets subroutines.

BTW, IE7 and IE8 don't use those IE4 subroutines either. And on my computers, IE8 has black areas in the menu area of the browser window, proof that Microsoft has once again released software without fully testing it. The black areas show up when you don't use the cartoonish XP or Vista interface and have Windows desktop set to the Classic or Custom theme.

I will be sending out a general announcement to everyone on my mailing lists when these two updates are ready. Sphere: Related Content

Wat Thamkrabok -- The Temple Where You Go to Vomit

contributed by Paul Garrigan

When I first heard about Wat Thamkrabok, my life had reached a desperate state. An alcohol addition had almost destroyed me, and I wasn't sure how much longer I had to live. My liver was in bad shape because of my alcoholism, and I had ignored a doctor's instructions, a few years previously, to see a consultant. I now feared that it was beyond repair. I had been an alcoholic for almost two decades and my life felt completely miserable and pointless; the sort of life I wouldn't wish a dog.

I found Wat Thamkrabok on the Internet. In the past I had tried many treatment options, but none of them had worked for me; I always ended up back drinking. I had lived in Thailand for a few years by this stage so it came as a surprise to find that such a treatment facility existed right under my nose. The information on the Internet provided something that had been missing in my life for years; it gave me hope. The regime at the temple sounded harsh, but the time for pussy-footing around had passed. I felt willing to do anything if it meant an escape from the misery that my life had become. Alcoholism was about to kill me anyway so what did I have to lose? I was only thrity-six and didn't want to die.

On my first day at the temple, I met a wonderful monk called Phra Hans who answered all the questions that had bugged me for years about my addiction to alcohol. He explained that I had been using alcoholism as a tool to cope with life. Maybe this tool had worked for a short while, but it was now counter-productive. This Swiss monk explained to me that my reason for choosing alcohol as a means to cope with the pain in life was that I had lost my path in life. If I once again found my way in life, then the need for alcohol would fall away. He went on to explain that there was no way that this path would become clear to me while I was still abusing alcohol or any drug.

I spent ten days at Wat Thamkrabok and at times it was harder then even I had imagined. The temple is famous for its use of an anti-emetic to speed the detox process along. For the first five days at the temple, we were expected to take this medicine and spend the next ten minutes vomiting up pints of water into a gutter. This humbling ceremony took place in front of a large crowd of other patients and supporters. It is a difficult process, but also a magical one. Most impressively, it did indeed speed the detox process along.

Wat Thamkrabok is a Buddhist temple but there is no attempt to convert anyone to any religion. Most of the monks are ex-addicts themselves so really know what they are talking about. The temple does not charge money for its work with alcoholics and addicts, which is pretty amazing when you compare it to the big money-making business that addiction treatment sometimes seems to have become in western countries. Not to take away from the good work that many of these treatment centres do.

On my first day at the temple, the Swiss monk warned me that Wat Thamkrabok could not cure me. It would still be up to me to do the work. What the temple did provide were great tools which would give me a chance at staying sober and living a happy life. I left the temple feeling completely cured of my addiction and so will always be grateful to it and believe it to be a magical place. I appreciate, though, that there are many options which work to lead addicts and alcoholics into recovery. It would not be practical for everyone to turn up in Thailand in the hope of beating their addiction; many would go home disappointed.

About the Author:

Paul Garrigan was born in Ireland, spent his twenties in England, and now lives in Thailand. Most of the year, he works as an ESL teacher, but he's also a qualified nurse. He has one book published and another one due for release in 2010. Sphere: Related Content

Termites in Thailand and Australia

Termites are also called "White Ants", and they are particularly prevalent in warm weather countries. Thailand has more than 100 species of termites, some of which are edible (but not by me).

Homeowners, though, get a little upset when termites start eating the wooden poles of their house. I lived in Australia for 10 years, and it was necessary to spray around the house annually. Also, when the house was built, screening was laid around the foundation and around the entrance holes for the various water and sewage pipes.

Some people in Australia build houses with a metal frame, rather than wood, just to reduce the chance of termite damage. However, it was reported that one home was damaged anyway because the owner did not spray around his house (hey, it's got a metal frame, why bother?) and the termites got inside by building a mud tunnel up the concrete foundation until they found a hole into the house, then they ate a path through the drywall (which has a paper coating). Paper is made from wood pulp, in other words, it's termite food.

Information on controlling termites can be found here:
http://www.Termite-Control.info Sphere: Related Content

New Dog Video - Too Cute For Words

Sphere: Related Content

Five Disadvantages of Living in Thailand

contributed by Fabletoo

I Love Thailand and Will Probably Live Here for the Rest of My Life, but It's Not Perfect

I have lived in Thailand for almost five years and I do love it. However, if you plan on coming to live in Thailand, do remember there are still disadvantages to living in Thailand especially for Westerners. Thailand is an exotic country, it's hot, it's frustrating sometimes and Thais do think differently than Westerners. Having lived here for almost five years, here are my top five frustrations with living in Thailand.

1. The Heat. A huge disadvantage about living in Thailand is the weather. The Thais joke they have three seasons - Hot, Hotter and Hottest. It's always hot here. Of course, Thailand has a 'winter' but, in Bangkok, it normally lasts for about three days and the heat only falls to a temperature of around 85 degrees. It's still hot. So, even though many of the Thais are wearing down jackets and sweaters (seriously!), most Westerners will still find it uncomfortable, sweaty and hot. According to the World Metereological Organization, Bangkok is the world's hottest city, so when a Thai tells you they have a winter, don't believe them.

2. The Traffic. The traffic in many Thai cities, but especially in Bangkok, is appalling, and this is probably the biggest disadvantage of living in Thailand for most Westerners. Traffic jams are a daily occurrence and, despite the Thai government saying they are trying to solve the problem, they seem to get worse every year. If I leave my house to go to work at 6am, it takes me less than 15 minutes to get there. If I leave my house at 7:15am, my commute to work now takes 2 hours. The one main street I travel to work on will simply be one huge traffic jam, which barely moves. Bangkok is also gridlocked on every street and every major freeway. Many Thais spend hours every day just sitting in traffic jams. This is also why they will normally organize meetings between 10am and 2pm. It's the only time the traffic isn't horrendous.

3. The Pollution. Bangkok pollution is really bad. It hangs in a gray pall all over the city and never really dissipates. For the first few months I was here, it always seemed difficult to breathe and was a huge disadvantage to my well being. Unfortunately, you do get used to the Bangkok pollution, and now I barely even notice it. My lungs probably do though.

4. Conversation. Most Thais do not speak very much English so conversation is difficult. I work in an office with all Thai employees, (I am the only Westerner), so that can sometimes be a little frustrating when I long for a 'Western conversation'. However, Thais are so nice and friendly, this fact does make up for the lack of Westerners at work.

5. Obtaining Visas and Work Permits. This can be frustrating in Thailand as the rules change all the time. I teach here and all teachers now have to have university degrees and TEFL (Teaching English as a Foreign Language) certification, as well as at least 2 years teaching experience. Without this, you cannot get a work permit in Thailand and, even with these qualifications, it requires many trips to immigration before you are completely legal.

Overall, living in Thailand is really wonderful and I do plan on staying here permanently. The above five disadvantages are very frustrating at times, but the advantages so far outweigh the disadvantages, most of the time they are nothing more than a minor nuisance. Sphere: Related Content

Illegal To Use Thai Spouse As Nominee In Land Ownership

Land purchase through Thai spouse forbidden

PHUKET CITY: The director general of the Land Department has reiterated that foreigners using Thai nominees to buy land anywhere in the country will have their land title deeds revoked if caught – even if the nominee in question is a lawfully wedded spouse.

Land Department Director Anuwat Meteewiboonwut made the comments during a recent stop in Phuket as part of a nationwide inspection tour of 30 provinces.

The tour is aimed at improving public services by land officials in three areas: dress, conduct when dealing with the public and working harder to eliminate a backlog of work.

Many members of the public have complained that it takes up to a year to complete a transaction that should only take one day, he said.

Mr Anuwat, a former governor of both Phang Nga and Samut Prakan provinces, said he was satisfied on the first two points, but rated the general level of success among land officials nationwide at speeding up their work rate at “only 30%”.

The next round of inspection tours will come in July, after which time personnel changes will be considered if service does not improve, he said.

“We have to keep pressure on them, otherwise the work will not get done,” he said.

As for foreigners seeking to buy homes in Phuket, they can do so through the Condominium Act, which allows foreign ownership of up to 49% of any project, he said.

Foreigners cannot use a Thai spouse as a nominee to buy property in Thailand, however.

“If the Thai spouse has enough money to buy the house that is fine, but if the Thai has no money and uses money given to him or her by a foreigner to acquire property, that is against the law. If we check and find out later that a Thai person has been using money from a foreigner to buy land anywhere in Thailand, we will revoke title deeds,” he said.

Mr Anuwat said the provisions of [Ministry of Interior] ministerial order 43 makes it difficult to issue land documents quickly, as it requires action from a number of different agencies. Desire for land on the island has also led to encroachment problems here, he said.

As a key market for property companies, Phuket is a constant source of problems and complaints to the director general’s office, he admitted.

“We will try to resolve these problems and develop our personnel continuously in order to provide high quality services. Fortunately the governor of Phuket used to work in the Land Department, so he understands the procedures and can help co-ordinate all the agencies involved,” he said.

Mr Anuwat was speaking of Phuket Governor Wichai Phraisa-ngop, who served as Land Office director in Nakhon Pathom in 1997 and as deputy director of the Land Department nationwide in 2003.

-- Phuket Gazette 2009-05-27 Sphere: Related Content

Photos of Our South Pacific Travels

In 2004, during the months of August to December, my wife and I visited many island countries in the South Pacific.

We visited a number of French Islands, including Nouvelle Caledonie (New Caledonia), Wallis Island (part of Wallis and Futuna, and which had incredibly beautiful sea views), Tahiti, and Hiva Oa in the Marquesas (where Gauguin and Jaques Brel are buried). I have stood next to Gauguin's grave and thanked him for his wonderful paintings of the South Seas.

We also visited many English-speaking islands, including Fiji, Western Samoa and American Samoa, Tonga, and Cook Islands (where everyone spoke with a New Zealand accent).

We visited Bali, Indonesia, staying primarily in Ubud, which is renowned for its art, although my wife and daughter did a tour of other parts of the island.

Brunei was small but scenic, and very Muslim.

We also visited Kuching, Malaysia, which was quite pleasant, and were in the air flying to Kuala Lumpur when the tsunami struck. The tsunami did not affect us at all.

We ended our tour in Bangkok, Thailand, in mid-January 2005.

We have many photos of this trip at http://www.thai-software.com/Personal/default.htm; you are welcome to browse the lot. Sphere: Related Content

Visa Run to Laos

A few days ago, I made my first visa run to Laos, by bus.

Normally I go to Singapore to get a 60-day tourist visa, but the last time I went, they refused to give me a 60-day visa because I have an open e-ticket back to Canada. They now want a confirmed ticket, and will not accept an open ticket. This is stupid, if you ask me. I told the lady at the front desk that if the violence in Bangkok gets bad, I can phone Air Canada and be on my way next day, so an open ticket is much better than a ticket for a particular date. No dice. So I had to fly back to Bangkok and got the usual 30-day entry at the airport. The entire trip cost me 18,000 baht, counting hotels, flights, meals, taxis, etc. What a waste.

I did a couple of visa runs by bus to Cambodia, and find that a pain in the bum, since you only get 14 days and then have to do it again, and it costs 2000 baht each time.

So this time, I signed up for the bus to Vientiane.

I must say that the service by the visa run company was excellent; the bus (a 40-seater) was full, and it was the same comfortable bus they use for the Cambodia runs, with the same driver. The driver is relatively conservative, seems to be mindful of the fact he's got 40 farangs on board, and is as careful a driver as you would want.

The bus left PB Tower on Sukhumvit Soi 71 exactly at 8:30PM.

There was a pee break about an hour later at a service centre, and then another 2 hours later, and so on, throughout the night. These gave the driver a chance to relax a bit, which I thought was a good idea.

Unfortunately, I have never been able to sleep on a bus or airplane, and this trip was no exception. While my seat mate happily snored away the night, I sat there bleary eyed, shifting in my seat periodically as my bum got sore. I appreciated the rest breaks as well.

A DVD movie was played at the start of the trip, but after it finished, it was after 11PM, so no more movies were shown.

We arrived at the border early, before 6:30. I watched the sun come up. We had to sit around for a while until the border office opened, and then one of the bus company ladies got all our passports processed. She had previously collected them on the bus.

After being stamped out of Thailand, we took 3 mini-buses (vans) across the bridge (Mekong River) into Laos, where again we waited while the lady got our passports processed by Lao immigration. In less than an hour, we took the mini-buses into Vientiane, and arrived at the street for the Thai Embassy about 7:30 or 7:40 AM. There were already at least 200 people lined up along the sidewalk, and it was hot.

The embassy gates opened about 8:15 AM, and we all filed into the embassy compound. There was a ticket machine at the front, and we joined the queue.

However, our erstwhile visa run lady ushered us up the stairs into an air-conditioned area and handed out low-numbered tickets from the machine. Our numbers started around 95, whereas the people at the ticket machine were getting tickets numbered over 350. So I presume she had some contact in Vientiane who stood at the beginning of the line at the gates at an early hour, and then passed the tickets to her when she arrived an hour or more later.

The ticket numbers were called out over the public address system in both Thai and English, and repeated once: "Ticket number 37, please proceed to counter number 2".

I soon noticed that there was no pause in the number callout, the announcements came non-stop, and soon reached the 80s. We all rushed downstairs to the counters and were there when our numbers came up. But the numbers just kept on rolling by. Our lady collected our passports and tickets, and lined them all up along the counter, and then told us to go wait in the other building.

Over there, we found there were four more counters, numbered 3 through 6, but only one, counter 4, was active, and there were at least 100 people waiting, sitting on chairs. This waiting room was also air conditioned.

Again, the numbers were called out, but this time there were big gaps between, and there was a substantial pause after each number was called. When a number was called, a person went up to counter 4, received a paper receipt, and then exited stage left.

After every batch of 10 or 12 numbers, there was a 5 or 6 minute delay. That was when I noticed that the Thai lady behind the counter was printing out and then separating the receipts. Clearly, the passports and applications were being processed in the other building, entered into a computer, and then the receipt was printed in this building at counter 4.

After about 30 or 40 minutes, my number was called; I went up to the counter, got my receipt and exited. The guy next to me had a lower number, but his number was not called, so he got a little upset and went up to the counter, where the lady told him to wait.

I went out the exit, and there was my visa run lady collecting the receipts, and then ushering us over to one of the vans. My receipt had shown "60 days double entry tourist visa" and "fee: $0", so I was happy.

The van took us to a local restaurant where we had a Thai/Lao food breakfast or brunch of fried rice and whatever. This was free, paid for by the visa run company, but soft drinks were 20 baht extra.

In Laos, you can use Lao kip, Thai baht, and US dollars interchangeably. If you pay in Thai baht, you get change in Thai baht. If you pay in US dollars, you get change in Lao kip, which, like Cambodian currency, has very high denominations and no value. A Pepsi was 20 baht, which was reasonable, but no diet drinks were available. By the way, ATM machines in Laos only dispense Lao kip.

After brunch, we were taken by van to the hotel, which turned out to be quite acceptable, maybe 2.5 stars. There was no pool, just a room, but it was a big room, private bathroom, and cable or satellite TV with many Thai, a few Lao, and some movie channels, including HBO and Star Movies.

The bathroom was typical Thai-style, with no shower stall or bath, and a shower head on the wall. There was a flash water heater which worked, and the toilet worked. The towels were large, red, fluffy, and obviously new.

I had paid an extra 200 baht at the front desk for a private room. The visa run fee of 5000 baht includes a shared room (2 per room). The fee will increase to 6000 baht after the free tourist visa promotion ends June 5.

In bed by 1PM in the afternoon, I slept for several hours, got up, showered, watched a movie, then went out in search of dinner. I walked up and down the main street near the hotel, but there was nothing appealing. However, the office complex 20 meters from the hotel had a restaurant, so I went in there and found 5 other farangs from the visa run also there. The food was good, the prices were not expensive, and I was able to pay with Thai baht. The young lady behind the bar was probably the most beautiful girl I have ever laid eyes on, and I have been to Thailand off and on for 20 years. She made me wish I was 25 again.

Next day, I had breakfast at the same restaurant, and then around 1PM, we piled into the vans again and were taken to the border. There are a lot of "duty free" shops at the border. We waited about 45 minutes or so, and then the visa run lady showed up, and we all went through Immigration with the Lao border people just looking at us, not asking to see our passports, which the visa run lady had.

Back across the bridge to Thailand, where we waited another 45 minutes or so, then it was back on the bus for the return trip. Within an hour, we stopped at a restaurant, where we had another Thai meal, again free, soft drinks extra, 20 baht.

The return trip seemed much faster, as several DVD movies were played, which occupies the time and the mind.

We arrived back in Bangkok at 1:30 AM. You can get dropped off anywhere along the route; some exited at Ramkhamhaeng. I waited until the end, which is just beside Ekamai BTS station, where I quickly discovered that the BTS was closed. An 80 baht taxi ride later, I was home again.

Would I do it again? Definitely, yes. The whole process was pretty much automatic. The company took care of everything. You do have to book a seat in advance, though. One farang apparently called to find out the price and time, showed up and was angry that there was no seat for him. But he had not made a reservation, had not left his name or phone number, so was out of luck. Of course, he had left it until the last day of his visa, so he would have to leave the next day somehow and pay the 500 baht overstay fee.

To summarize: you leave at 8:30PM, spend a night on the bus. Then it's half a day waiting around, with brunch included. Check into the hotel, sleep a bit or, if you have the stamina, explore Vientiane. Not much there, though. Have dinner, sleep one night at the hotel. Next day, wait around for a morning or visit Vientiane, then bus it back to Bangkok, arriving about 1:30 AM.

If you want to do this yourself, the company I used was "Quick Thai Visa Run", 6th floor, PB Tower, Sukhumvit Soi 71. The contact is Phillip, who speaks perfect English, at 02-713-2498 (office hours) or 09-0245-255 (24 hours). They have a web site at www.ThaiVisaRun.com, but it hasn't been updated in a while, and only mentions their Cambodia run, not the Laos run. Sphere: Related Content

Songkran and Time for Another Coup

It's Songkran here now, Thai New Year, when people throw water and smear powder on your cheeks for good luck. However, many people have gone back to their villages to be with their families, so the streets are empty and there are no traffic jams.

There are now 3 mobs of people protesting. The red shirts, supporters of Thaksin, are protesting the current government and succeeded in embarrassing Thailand and closing the ASEAN Summit. The government has declared a State of Emergency, and I got a notice from the Canadian Department of External Affairs (I registered with them) warning me to be cautious and to notify any other Canadians. The blue shirts are a new unknown group who attacked the red shirts with sticks and beat them. The yellow shirts support Sondhi who wants to change the parliamentary system to have half the seats appointed by government. They call themselves the People's Alliance for Democracy, but what they want is to kill democracy.

The red shirts are supporters of Thaksin's party, which handed out money to the poor provinces for infrastructure; Isaan and the NW (Chiang Mai - Chiang Rai) got a lot of money, which was far in excess of anything the government had done previously. Thaksin is from Chiang Mai. The poor provinces total 30 million people and make up almost half the Thai population, but the government would prefer they go away. Thaksin helped them, they voted his party into power, which upset the ruling class ... the royalty and the business people. This is why Sondhi, who is a rich business man, wants to kill half of parliament, to make sure it doesn't happen again.

But Thaksin did some stupid things, including setting up a dummy company in the Caribbean to avoid paying Thai taxes, and selling Shinawatra Corp, which he owned personally, to the Singapore government. Shinawatra owns Thailand's only satellite, and all Thai government communications, and military communications, as well as many private (business and personal) are funnelled trough that satellite. This upset the military, who did not want Singapore to be able to access their secret messages. All communications are encoded, of course, but with enough horsepower, anything can be broken.

The poor people are all over Bangkok, in the low-paying jobs: waiters and waitresses, taxi drivers, construction workers, etc. They are like Mexicans in the US, everywhere, invisible, and the country would fall apart if they are not there. The taxi drivers blocked major intersections a few days ago, in support of the red shirts, and Thaksin has been making videos which are played to huge crowds of red shirts.

I expect there will either be a coup or another military intervention or the resignation of the government in the next couple of weeks.

Such is life in Thailand. Sphere: Related Content

Yet Another Cambodia Visa Run

Although I swore I would never do it again, I made another visa run to Cambodia by bus. The one I use leaves from the coffee shop opposite Ekamai Bus Station at Sukhumvit Soi 31. It leaves at 9:30 AM, which is an OK time for me, and returns about 7PM the same day. It costs 2000 baht, and you need your passport (of course), 2 passport photos, plus a photocopy of the ID page of your passport.

It's one day, there and back by bus. It's a big tour bus, but no toilet, but they do play DVDs. It's 4.5 hours there, 1 hour at the border, 4.5 hours back, more or less depending on traffic.

It's hard on the bum. There is a toilet break half way both directions, and they feed you a free lunch. It costs 2000 baht which is about Cdn$72 currently. Half goes to the Cambodian government for a 30 day visa which is issued and then immediately cancelled. The bad news is that this visa takes up a whole page in your passport, it's not just a stamp.

Coming back into Thailand, they give you only a 14 day visa. It used to be 30 days and an unlimited number of entries; now it's 14 days and a max of 3 entries. While Thailand desperately needs tourists and the Tourist Association of Thailand is advertising worldwide, the Immigration Dept is making it more difficult. It's the Thai way.

Cambodia is dirt poor, literally.

The village at the border has no paved roads. There are always a dozen or more children begging for money. One of the little girls that I gave some money to a couple of years ago, when she was 7, is now about 9, I think.

Two years ago, when I gave her about $1, and some other kids lesser amounts, they all ran over to the local shop and bought potato chips and gum and candy, so I don't give them money any more.

The kids go to school (I asked) but learn only pissah khmen (Khmer), no Thai, no English, at least at that age. However, the kids understand and speak some Thai, which is what I use, and the 9 year old girl now understands and speaks some English, which she apparently taught herself in the few brief moments while trying to wheedle money out of the farangs. Poor, yes, stupid, no.

The kids call me "papa", which is the word they use for all old guys. The kids are downright cute, I can understand why people want to adopt them. I believe Angelina Jolie adopted a Cambodian boy after making Tomb Raider there.

Two years ago, when tanks rolled into BKK, the military closed all borders and people were stranded for a week. I was praying that would not happen again, and it didn't.

The worst part, other than the long sitting, and the often crappy movies, is the toilets at the highway rest stops (gasoline stations with an attached market), which are awful. First thing I do back in Bangkok is walk to the Landmark Hotel and use their toilet. Last night I also had dinner at the Landmark's Huntsman's Pub in the basement, something I rarely do because it charges Western prices. However, I needed real Western food, other than hamburgers and KFC, and so had an English meal: pork chop, baked potato, apple sauce, carrots and peas, and a Yorkshire pudding (not as good as my mother's, though). But the Coke Zero was 106 baht (more than $3) and the entire dinner cost 455 baht (an arm and a leg). I often eat from a street vendor for 40 baht, and did so tonight.

I hate this trip and each time vow never to do it again, but it's cheap, and I needed a delay until I get my new software product done. I have to leave Thailand again on the 26th.

Surprisingly, the day after the trip, I always suffer from "bus lag"; I am always exhausted, no energy, short attention span, sleep a lot. Sphere: Related Content

Failed to Get a Tourist Visa in Singapore

I have made many visa runs to Singapore in the past, so many I have lost count, but it's over 10. Being a Canadian, I have never had a problem: no request to show sufficient money, no request for ongoing ticket. However, I have been frustrated on more than one occasion by the embassy being closed, in spite of diligent research on the web... they close for Christian holidays, Muslim holidays, Hindu holidays, Singapore national holidays, Thai national holidays, and if a goat wanders into the compound.

I was not expecting any problems this time, and knew that the 60-day tourist visa would be free. They have now set up a waiting area under a tent, just to the right of the embassy building, with picnic tables and enough space for 30 or more people to fill out their application forms. However, there were exactly 2 people there when I arrived, and 2 more when I left. It seems that people are not rushing to visit Thailand.

I filled out my form, took it to the same Muslim lady at the window; she has worked there for as long as I have been going there. I recognized her, and I am sure she recognized me.

This time she asked to see my onward ticket. I said I had an open e-ticket with Air Canada, but she said that was not good enough. She said, "Because the visa is free, we are now requiring a real ticket with a confirmed date." I offerred to pay the SGD$50 fee, but she said no, they can't do that.

I asked her what I should do, and she said just fly back and you will get 30 days at the airport.
So I did that, and got the 30 days with no hassle, but the abortive trip cost almost 18,000 baht... 2 nights in a hotel, return air fare, meals, taxis, etc.

A bit pricey for 30 days, after which I will have to do something similar. If the "free" visa scheme is still in effect then, I will just fly out of Thailand, and then come back on the next flight; I won't wait around in a hotel, nor visit the embassy.

I have done the bus ride to Cambodia many times, and did one two weeks ago; hard on the bum, and a total waste of a day, but it only costs 2000 baht. But you only get 15 days now, and can only do that 3 times; I won't be doing any more of those.

I live in the Sukhumvit Soi 4 area; the restaurants here are mostly empty every night and the hotels have dropped their rates by 50%. Seems the "free" visa deal is not having much effect, and imposing conditions on it makes it worse. On the one hand, the government desperately wants tourists; on the other hand, the Immigration Dept seems to be making it more and more difficult. Sphere: Related Content

All Thai Ladies Are Prostitutes?

I have a friend who is a waitress at a large open-air restaurant frequented by both Thais and farangs. She is attractive, and has a happy, positive personality. She is frequently asked by farangs (never by Thai males) to go with them to their hotel. However, she is not a prostitute and is offended by these farangs. Unfortunately, it happens almost every day.

In their own country, most men would never go up to a waitress in a restaurant and offer her money to sleep with him. Why do they assume that women here are different?

It seems that many men lose all sense of reality when visiting Thailand.

She told me about one guy who was very persistent, asking her several times a day for a week, and raising the amount of money each time. He started at 500 baht, but was offering 5000 baht by the end of the week. Then he left and went back to his home country. She asked me how to handle this situation.

I told her that a guy like that is most likely a jerk, which was a term she did not understand. So I said he was probably too stupid or unwilling to understand that "no" means "no". He is not able to understand how a poor, uneducated Thai woman could resist his charms.

She laughed, and said, "He old, Doug, nah-gih-ad (ugly). He drink bee-ah alla time, alla time. He smoke cigalette. Me no like."

I said, if it happens again, tell the farang that you have a husband and two children. That brings other people into the equation, which should give him pause. If it doesn't, then you can say, "Please don't bother me, I am not a prostitute and am not interested". She wrote down these phrases in Thai phonetics.

Then if he still insists, you can say, "Hit the road, Jack!"

She did not understand that expression, either, so that night I got on the Internet, found the lyrics to the song and printed them out. I also downloaded an MP3 from a file sharing site.

Next day, I showed her the lyrics and played the song on an MP3 player, but first I explained that the song was about a big black woman throwing out this black guy from her life because he was no good. She loved the concept and when she heard the music, which was Ray Charles singing, she loved the song, too. I helped her follow along with the printed lyrics and she memorized some of the song, mainly the chorus.

A few months after this, her English had vastly improved through her own efforts; she is highly intelligent and a very fast learner. She happened to be somewhere relaxing one day with HBO on the TV and the Ray Charles Story came on. She knew who Ray Charles was because of the song I had taught her. She was fascinated with the movie, followed most of the English dialog with no problem, and sang along when "Hit the Road, Jack" was played. She said the movie made her cry several times, but she loved it and wants to watch it again.

I also told her that, if the guy still asks her to have sex after she tells him to hit the road, she is allowed to say "Just fuck off!" and walk away, but that that is the supreme insult, and she should reserve that until the end.

Shortly after that, yet another annoying farang, this one American, would not leave her alone. She used the phrase, "Hit the road, Jack!" and he stopped in amazement, with his mouth hanging open.

"How do you know that?", he asked.

"I have a good teacher," she responded. Then she said she talked about the movie and how Ray Charles was a mix of good and bad, but that she loved his music. She said the guy stopped asking her to sleep with him, but came back every day just to chat. Her English was very good, she was / is highly intelligent, and he just enjoyed her company without trying to get her into bed.

So she now considers this phrase, "Hit the road, Jack!" to be a potent weapon in her arsenal. Sphere: Related Content

Motorcycles and Accidents

In the last two months, I am aware of three motorcycle accidents in my area.

Tonight, coming out of Ploenchit Centre onto Sukhumvit Soi 2, there was a bunch of people clustered around the point where the driveway meets the road. There was an overturned motorcycle, which looked suspiciously like a police motorcycle, as it was creamy-white and had a red beacon light on a post. There were at least 8 people standing around, three of whom looked like uniformed security guards.

One young lady was lying on the ground, sitting up, and holding another who was whimpering and obviously in pain and probably shock. The one holding her was obviously trying to comfort the injured girl but not having much success. I didn't see any blood, and the girl's jeans and shirt were not torn, so I suspect she got hit by the white motorcycle and knocked flying.

I stood there and watched for a good ten minutes, wondering if I should help or intervene to get the girl to a hospital. No taxi pulled up and no ambulance either.

Finally I decided that she was well taken care of by the 7 or 8 people standing around, and I began to leave.

Just at that moment, a motorcycle taxi came out of the parking lot beside and behind me, trying to go out the entrance rather than driving another 8 or 10 meters and go out the exit. A security guard jumped into his path and told him sternly not to drive there, to go out the exit, not the entrance. The motorcycle taxi driver said "I'm just going over to the Rajah Hotel" and pointed down Soi 2, and the guard let him go. If I had been the security guard, I would have rapped the motorcycle driver on the knuckles and enforced the rules, but this is Thailand, and I am not a security guard.

A couple of weeks ago, my assistant came to work one day, limping, with her face scratched up and with her left eye swollen and bruised. It looked like she had been in a fight. She said she had been walking on the sidewalk on Soi 4 and a motorcycle taxi had come up behind her and knocked her down. The bike ended up on top of her, and somehow she ended up with a black eye.

She said the driver was most concerned and drove her to Chulalongkorn Hospital. Bumrungrad is much closer, but Bumrungrad charges farang rates, whereas Chulalongkorn charges Thai rates. He stayed with her at the hospital and paid her bill. You see, there is at least one gentleman in Thailand. Then he drove her back to Soi 4.

I asked if she sat on the motorcycle like a man (legs on both sides of the bike) or like a woman (side-saddle, a particularly dangerous and unstable way to ride a motorcycle, especially after you've been in an accident and are unsteady). She said "sidesaddle, of course". Sigh.

I told her that if a motorcycle on the sidewalk knocks me down, the first thing I would do is punch the idiot in the face. But that's just me. They're not supposed to ride on the sidewalk in the first place, but they take it as their personal roadway with all these stupid and annoying pedestrians blocking the way.

About six weeks ago, I happened to be at the corner of Sukhumvit and Soi 4 waiting for the light to change so I could chance crossing the road. I was right beside the police box.

A motorcycle carrying a large load came up fast along Sukhumvit, no more than a metre from me, and then zigged right, immediately in front of a car. He hit the bumper of the car and the bike went flying. The car driver slammed on the brakes, which was fortunate, as the driver, bike, and cargo were scattered immediately in front of the car. The bike rider rolled a few times and came to a stop face down.

Within seconds, a policeman emerged from the police box, and walked quickly over to the car, said something to the driver, and then motioned the car to go around the mess and leave. He walked over to the motorcyclist, who was now sitting on his bum, trying to get his helmet off. The policeman yelled at him, then helped him stand the bike up and push it off to the middle of Sukhumvit, which has a wide median and concrete pillars holding up the SkyTrain. They stood the bike on its stand next to a pillar. Then they went back and gathered up his cargo, which turned out to be bolts of material. Then, are you ready for this? The policeman pulled out his pad and wrote the idiot driver a ticket. I was impressed.

Now if we could somehow teach the other 4 million motorcycle drivers about the rules of the road, I would be extremely happy. Sphere: Related Content

Troubles with a Thai Woman

I don't think there is a farang in Thailand who got into a relationship with a Thai woman and then did not regret it. This is the story of one of my assistants, whom I will call "R".

My relationship with her was not sexual, strictly business. When she got pregnant, supposedly on the first sexual experience with her boyfriend, she did not want to tell her aged father, so she lived at my place, in a second bedroom, and I treated her like a daughter as her pregnancy advanced.

Nevertheless, she stole a lot of money from me.

She did it in a subtle way: we were supposed to participate in the IT trade show at Muang Thong Thani in July 2006. I worked nights to get Speak Easy Thai done on time. "R" made the arrangements; she said the booth was free, as the Ministry of Industry had a promotion to help small business start-ups, but there were certain expenses.

I paid for a security deposit for the booth, although the rental was free. I also paid for an advertising sign, 300 CD-ROMs with packaging, promotional T-shirts, and 1000 brochures. All together, it was over 30,000 baht. However, "R" said she found a sponsor with her sister’s help (her sister works at the German Embassy) that would help defray the costs.

I worked nights until 3AM to make the deadline.

Then at the last minute, "R" said the Ministry had cancelled the booth; she said they wanted to set up a display honouring the Queen for her birthday.

But the security deposit did not get refunded. The CD-ROMs did not get produced. There were no T-shirts, brochures, or a sign. And there was no sponsor.

One day, "R" called and said she was in the office of the CD-ROM company waiting while they did the final packaging. She called 5 times, every two hours, saying she was still waiting. Next day, no "R" and no CD-ROMs. The day after that, the CD-ROM company called and said, “When are you going to pick up your CDs? They have been sitting here all week.” I said, "R" said she was there waiting for them all day, two days ago. He said, “No, nobody has been here all week. And by the way, they are not paid for yet.”

So I went there, and sure enough, the CDs are sitting there in boxes, waiting. I got money out of the bank and paid for them again, and took them away.

No word from "R".

Finally, she gets in touch and says she has the T-shirts and brochures and sign, but her boyfriend is driving around with them in his van. I say, “Put them in a taxi and send them here, and I will pay the taxi on arrival”. Next day she calls and says she put them in a taxi, and paid the driver for me. No taxi showed up. She said the taxi driver must have stolen the stuff.

This is beginning to sound like a Monty Python sketch.

She also had my notebook computer which I had loaned her for two days. After 6 weeks, she would not give it back.

I got in a taxi with my other assistant, "P", and we drove out to her parents’ area, near Mall Number One. I called her several times, saying I was coming. She did not want to give the computer back. I insisted, saying I was in a taxi and coming to her parents’ house. She panicked, would not let us go to her parents’ place, but met us at the Mall with the notebook. So at least I got that back.

I never did get the 30,000 baht back and I know I never will. Sphere: Related Content

How to Learn Thai Like a Three Year Old

How does a child learn a language? They are born unable to speak, and for the first 12 months, just make noises. But after 12 months, words come. Single words initially, but by 24 months, most children are speaking in simple sentences and have a vocabulary of several hundred words.

By the age of 5, most children can form complex sentence structures and communicate their thoughts and desires quite well.

How did they learn that? No young child has formal grammar lessons, they don't do verb conjugations, they don't do spelling tests, and they have no idea what "grammar" means.

In Western cultures, parents often sit with a young child looking at picture books and encourage learning. In Asian cultures, especially in poor Asian families, this is less of an occurrence, simply because they can't afford to buy books. Still, even in Asian cultures, children are reasonably fluent in their language by the age of 5.

How, exactly, do they do that? And can you use the same techniques to learn a language like Thai?

The short answer is "imitation". Children copy adults. They hear the sounds, they see the actions associated with those sounds, and their brains make connections.

The brain is a complex instrument; some people compare it to a computer, as it has inputs (sight, taste, sound, touch) and outputs (speech, movement), and storage (memory). But it is more complex than any existing computer. Your brain is constantly taking in information every waking moment, filtering some of it out, and storing the rest in "short term memory". For example, as I am writing this here in my room in Bangkok, I can hear traffic noise from the Expressway which is not far away. My brain is not storing that noise very long, maybe only a second or two, and then it is discarded. But if someone talks to me, the storage time dramatically increases; I can recall what someone said to me half an hour ago, but if you ask me to repeat what someone said two hours or two months ago, the exact words are lost, all I have retained is the general concept. Your "long term memory" contains far fewer details.

When you try to learn an "alien" language like Thai, you need to find a way to make the brain remember the details. I call it "alien" because Thai does not use English characters, it has its own alphabet. The sounds and rhythm of the language are different from English and other European languages, the grammar is totally different, and the vocabulary has different base sounds. "Alien" seems more appropriate than "foreign".

Children learn by imitation. But you have an adult brain. If someone sits in front of you and says "meu" 35 times, and you repeat it 35 times, will you remember the word? Probably not, because it is not in any kind of context. While you might remember it for a day, a month later it's gone. It's just a sound, has no meaning. But if I show you a picture of a hand with six fingers, not five, and say "meu" twice, only twice, chances are you will remember that word the rest of your life.

Why is that? Because hands normally have five fingers, if I show you a picture of a hand with six fingers, that is something different; your brain will associate that picture and the sound together and make a permanent link in your memory. That's how children learn, but we have tricked the brain to learn faster by making the image unusual to force the link.

Furthermore, if I show you a picture of the Thai word for hand in Thai script at the same time as I show you the image and say the word, your brain will store two images... the pattern of the Thai word and the picture of the hand, along with the sound of the word; this is a three way link. A week later, when you see that word written in Thai, your brain will fire a recognition trigger and pull up the image of the six-fingered hand and you will hear the word in your brain. You didn't learn the Thai script, the characters, you learned the pattern of characters that makes the word.

It's like seeing "WORD" as "WORD" rather than "W", "O", "R", "D". It's the whole pattern that is important, not the individual letters. While you are reading this article, you are recognizing words, not spelling letters.

This is why I wrote Speak Easy Thai the way I did; the software uses 5000 interesting pictures tied to 5000 words spoken by native Thai speakers and shows you the Thai word in Thai script so your brain can make those important 3-way links. This is an excellent way to learn vocabulary; you just use the program for 10 or 15 minutes whenever you feel like it, and you get new vocabulary each time.

There is another section of Speak Easy Thai which shows 16 cartoon scenarios of common situations, like shopping in a supermarket, being in a classroom, renting a car, etc. I chose to have a young girl (my niece) draw these cartoons because she was not a professional artist. I knew in advance that her drawings would be childish and not professional, and they are. And because of that, they are memorable. When you learn vocabulary with her cartoons, you are learning words in context, like a child, and because the cartoons are different, your brain makes the 3-way links.

I have toured many of the world's greatest museums and art galleries and viewed thousands of paintings and sculptures. But the ones I remember are the ones that were different in some way: Gauguin's colourful south seas series is highly memorable, much more so than the thousands of renaissance art pieces. Michelangelo's David is another example. Dali's paintings are one more.

While Speak Easy Thai's cartoons are certainly not up to the caliber of Gauguin, they are different enough from the norm that your brain remembers the cartoon and the Thai words in context.

Learn like a child. See, hear, remember. That's what Speak Easy Thai is all about.

About the Author:

Douglas Anderson is the author of Speak Easy Thai [http://www.Thai-Culture-Publishing.com], an easy way to learn Thai vocabulary. The software runs on Windows PCs or Macs under BootCamp and includes Fundamentals of Thai Grammar [http://www.learn-faster.org/Thai], a 350-page eBook. Speak Easy Thai uses the Internet for updates, but does not require an Internet connection during operation.

More Thai resources at Learn Thai Faster! [http://www.learn-faster.org/Thai/]

Sphere: Related Content

Thai People and Common Sense

Having lived in Thailand for a number of years, I am convinced that Thai people lack the common sense gene. I love them, I love living here, but every farang here has seen many examples of seemingly stupid behaviour, ranging from sidewalks that are broken and barely usable to the recent tragedy at the Santika Club on New Year's Eve.

I live very close to the Nana Entertainment Plaza on Sukhumvit Soi 4, so tonight I walked around before it opened at 7:00 PM. I was checking to see if that complex had any safety features. I didn't expect much and I didn't find much.

If you haven't been there, allow me a moment to describe it. There is a single entrance to a U-shaped complex with bars on 3 levels. The first level is the ground floor; there is no basement. The structure is concrete, although there is lots of wood around. At the entrance, there are bars on opposite sides of the lane, and both are made of wood. I could not see any sprinkler system, fire hose, alarm system, not even a water pail.

I would guess there are about 30-35 bars, ranging from small to huge. All of the bars have decorations of some sort inside, they are not bare concrete. At the Santika, some people died because of the poisonous fumes from the burning decorations.

Wandering around on the two upper levels, and peeking into some of the bars, which had doors open, but were not operating yet (because it was before 7:00 PM), I saw zero evidence of safety features.

No alarms, no fire hoses, no sprinklers, not a single extinguisher in evidence.

And there is only one way out of the complex, and that's through the small lane at the front. There is often a truck parked in that lane, presumably making deliveries, and there are street vendors as well.

There don't appear to be any other entrances/exits to this complex, but I do know that there are metal fire escapes on the outside at the right. I know because I used them once when the police raided the short-time hotel in which I was passing a short time and I had to use that metal platform and climb back through a window into one of the ladyboy bars. Got some funny looks that night, as I came out of the ladyboy dressing room and walked in front of the stage in full view of 20 or so patrons. It's one of the stranger things I have done in my life.

What happened at Santika is tragic. But if a fire ocurred at Nana Plaza, there would likely be 10 times as many deaths because it's much larger, there's no safety equipment or emergency equipment of any kind, and there's only one way out.

I wonder if Bangkok city government (Bangkok Metropolitan Administration) will now clamp down on safety; clearly nothing has been done so far. I suspect most commercial buildings, other than those built by Western companies, are lacking in basic safety features.

I live on a narrow soi, one lane wide. As you probably know, traffic here drives on the left. Except motorcycles, which go wherever they please. I have seen many instances where a car or truck is trying to manoeuver around the tight corners, and a motorcycle comes roaring up and squeezes in between the vehicle and the concrete building at the corner. Common sense would say, stop and wait 30 seconds until there is more clearance, but like I said, that gene is missing.

Walking along the sidewalk near Nana Plaza in the evening is a joke. In too many places, street vendors have blocked the path, leaving a very narrow space. When two Westerners approach from opposite sides, one always gives way; it's the polite thing to do. Whenever I have done this, invariably two or three Thai people who were walking behind me refuse to stop, and squeeze through the extremely narrow opening, which is even narrower because there's a hulking great farang coming at them. No common sense.

Today I was walking along the bike path which runs between the train tracks and a service road. My apartment is within a few meters of the service road. I discovered a while ago that it was better to walk along the bike path because it is asphalt and relatively smooth and marked down the middle with a dotted line, indicating two lanes. If you walk on the right side, bikes and motorcycles drive on the left and there is no conflict. That's right, motorbikes use the bicycle path. This afternoon, however, I was walking along that path, keeping to the right, on my way to Ploenchit Centre. Suddenly there was a loud beep right behind me. I jumped into the ditch at the right, and looked back, and nearly fell over. There were two cars driving along this narrow bike path. No common sense.

A week ago, I was walking along the train track, and was amazed at the condition of the ties. They are very old and rotted. In many places, the spikes that hold the track to the ties are missing; the wood is in such bad condition that the spikes have simply fallen out. In this picture, taken just a few metres from Sukhumvit, the girl has her feet on a tie. Look where that tie meets the rail at the left. There should be a spike there, but there isn't. These ties are in relatively good condition; in other places, they should have been replaced 10 years ago.

There are a dozen trains a day along this track. One wonders how long it will be before a train causes the rails to move apart an extra few centimetres and there is a derailment. Just on the other side of Sukhumvit, many people live within 2 meters of the track. If a derailment occurred there, their houses would be destroyed and many people would die.

When I first came to Thailand in 1988, the traffic was much less and the pollution was ten times worse. One day, I was in a taxi that was driving along Ploenchit at a good clip, maybe 60 km an hour; traffic was light. I was in the back seat. When we got to the intersection with the Erawan Shrine, the driver took both hands off the steering wheel, looked at the Buddha in the shrine and made a wai. This took 20 seconds or so. We're travelling 60 kph straight ahead and he's looking 90 degrees to the left. No common sense.

There's no doubt that living in Thailand is an experience. I just wish the people could learn a little common sense.

Sphere: Related Content